the selfie...

stephanie.march 2013. los angeles. christina and kenneth's wedding. Los Angeles. March. 2013.

I'm still throwing up inside my mouth because I actually typed that word. If you don't know to what I am referring, you either also have not been on the internet, do not have kids, or are in denial. I am currently pondering how this photo happened, and all the things behind the idea of a self-portrait taken on a mobile device and instantly uploaded for public consumption.

The facts:

I was at wedding.

I made my dress and I had not gotten a photo of it. So this seemed necessary.

I texted this photo to a guy that I (think) I am dating. He did not immediately respond.

Mitigating circumstances:

It was an open bar. They made stellar manhattans.

There was no one else in the bathroom at the time of (multiple, I'm sure) photographs.

I stood somewhere out of site while I picked the best filter and waited for successful upload as to not be antisocial or rude.

This was the only photo (I think) that I took of myself alone.

I later saw many selfies of other wedding guests on various social networks.

Everyone, and it does not matter who you are or what you look like or how old you are, wants an awesome photo of his or her self and there is no shame in that, but it is strange how prevalent the practice seems to be. My younger sister does it. My boss does it. My grandpa is probably doing it right now. The desire to photograph oneself seems to be universal, regardless of one's self-confidence, vanity, exhibitionism, or lack thereof. Why we think that we can take it ourselves is nuts, but we try and try and our efforts, for better or worse, make it on the internet for public view due to our own actions. It's like we want to be our own paparazzi. I don't really get it, but I also totally get it. I hate it and I love it and I think that it's actually a central part of being human. We are tapping into the very root of our primal being -  our need to carry on, our dream to last forever, if only in pixel form on the interwebs (because I highly doubt anyone has ever printed out his/her own selfie).

I wonder what future generations will be like with this ability capture one's own image, edit it, and proliferate it all from a small device in seconds. Will this speed up self-awareness? Will this encourage self-love? Will this practice increase or decrease vanity? Does it make us feel better about ourselves or worse? Does it depend of how we already feel? If we only take self-portraits when we feel awesome (or drunk), shouldn't that make us feel more awesome and isn't that a good thing? Is this just the evolution of centuries of ego-centric human behavior?